Did Someone Get The Number On That Truck?

I suck.

It's gotta be what's going on. Poker, for me, should be called "Anything You Can Do I Can Do Better". Absolutely could not get a goddamn thing to stand up. Observe.

$10+$1 - 9th - -$11

This should have been the sign right here...

Party Poker No-Limit Hold'em Tourney, Big Blind is t30 (9 handed) converter

BB (t730)
ICP_Paul (t525)
UTG+1 (t755)
MP1 (t1420)
MP2 (t670)
MP3 (t680)
CO (t440)
Button (t1330)
SB (t1450)


Preflop: ICP_Paul is UTG with Ah, Ad.

ICP_Paul raises to t150, UTG+1 folds, MP1 folds, MP2 folds, MP3 folds, CO folds, Button folds, SB calls t135, BB folds.


Flop: (t330) 4c, 2c, 8h (2 players)

SB bets t1300 (All-In), ICP_Paul calls t375 (All-In).


Turn: (t2005) 7d (2 players, 2 all-in)


River: (t2005) 3s (2 players, 2 all-in)


Final Pot: t2005
Main Pot: t1080 (t1080), between ICP_Paul and SB. > Pot won by SB (t1080).
Pot 2: t925 (t925), overbet by SB.

Results:
ICP_Paul shows Ah Ad (one pair, aces).
SB shows 4h 2h (two pair, fours and twos).
Outcome: SB wins t2005.

'Nuff said.

$10+$1 - 4th - -$11

This one started out great! I hit the nut flush on the flop and managed to milk some guy for T780, putting me in great position to just sit back...

Then the bleed begins. T150 goes away when I get caught in a raise war between a pair of queens and a pair of Jacks. I had AJs. Of course, the Queens go down when the flop brings the set Jack. If the AA debacle of last game was a warning, this should have been the equivalent of the explosions outside the window type of warning. Then this...

Party Poker No-Limit Hold'em Tourney, Big Blind is t100 (6 handed) converter

CO (t1365)
Button (t875)
SB (t2010)
ICP_Paul (t2050)
UTG (t1040)
MP (t660)


Preflop: ICP_Paul is BB with 9h, Jh.
UTG folds, MP folds, CO folds, Button raises to t200, SB folds, ICP_Paul calls t100.


Flop: (t450) Td, Jc, 4d (2 players)

ICP_Paul bets t300, Button raises to t675 (All-In), ICP_Paul calls t375.


Turn: (t1800) Kd (2 players, 1 all-in)


River: (t1800) 5d (2 players, 1 all-in)


Final Pot: t1800
Main Pot: t1800 (t1800), between Button and ICP_Paul. > Pot won by Button (t1800).

Results:

ICP_Paul shows 9h Jh (one pair, jacks).

Button shows Qc Ah (straight, ace high).

Outcome: Button wins t1800.

Yup. Gutshot straight draw and two overcards? The way this day is going? This guy had been taking every opportunity to steal my blinds. Figures when I call him he's got a hand. Can't qualify this as a bad beat, but it was a pretty questionable all-in in the face of a big raise. That was the theme today. No respect.

I bleed T300 more right away from the SB when I try to move someone off the blind and he calls me up. Flop comes with the ace, I put out T100 and get re-raised all-in. Adios.

T400 goes bye bye when I raise KJo from late position and get called down. Flop comes 886 and caller-boy shoves.

The game drags on with some 6 people still in and the blinds now 200/400 (more on this later). I've got T570 left and I'm looking at the blinds coming. I make my stand on K7o and get called up by QTo. Of course, I don't make it and she does and it's syanara time again.

$10+$1 - 5th - -$11

Will someone put a friggin device on my mouse that will shock me when I attempt to make a play early? I get 99 in the pocket twice in 5 hands and for some bizzare reason I think I should play these in the first level of the tourney. -T215 collectively for the two plays, and immediately I'm in chip trouble. I initially make it back when I flop the nut straight and get an all-in from the short stack of the day, but, obviously, it didn't last.

KQo gets mucked when my T150 raise is re-raised to T500.

JAo goes down at the flop when it misses and I'm bet into. -T230

A few blinds where I pick up such illustrious crap as 84o, and I'm looking at the short stack again. Blinds are now 200/400, there's 5 left. I think I see a theme here.

I make my stand with K8o and am called by KQo. Flop comes KQ7. Neat. Just to add the final "fuck you" the river brings my 8. Thanks for playing.

$10+$1 - 3rd - +$9

Well, here I was hoping that I might be turning a corner here.

Party Poker No-Limit Hold'em Tourney, Big Blind is t200 (3 handed) converter

BB (t2100)
ICP_Paul (t1490)
SB (t4410)


Preflop: ICP_Paul is Button with As, Ah.
ICP_Paul calls t200, SB folds, BB checks.


Flop: (t500) 2h, Js, 9d (2 players)

BB bets t500, ICP_Paul raises to t1290 (All-In), BB calls t790.


Turn: (t3080) Jh (2 players, 1 all-in)


River: (t3080) Tc (2 players, 1 all-in)


Final Pot: t3080
Main Pot: t3080 (t3080), between BB and ICP_Paul. >

Results:
BB shows Jd 5h (three of a kind, jacks).
ICP_Paul shows As Ah (two pair, aces and jacks).
Outcome: BB wins t3080.

Outstanding.

$10+$1 - 5th - -$11

I make another early move in this one. A8s and I'm in middle position. As I see so often in this level, a couple of poeple limp and I raise it up. The limpers call and the flop brings AdKd5c. Guy before me puts out a T30 wimp bet, so I call to see what comes, thinking perhaps I'm looking at second pair betting into me. Turn brings my 8d and EP limper throws out T200. Other limper is gone and I smooth call. River comes the 6d for four diamonds on the board and I figure I'm fucked here. Remarkably, the raiser checks and I check behind and am rather astonished to see the pot coming my way. What did he have? 9sKh.

I hide out for a couple of orbits. With the blinds now at 50/100 I start to make some moves.... backwards.

A3h hits a 3 in a blinds battle, but I get no further help and cannot succeed in moving the SB off the pot. -T300

Next hand, QsJd in the small blind. I raise to steal and am called. Oh well. Flop comes 4dKd7h. I bet T150 to represent the K, he shoved T1780 in to represent the Universal "Fuck You". -T250

-T150 from blinds, and I'm down to short stack. This is a recurring theme. Final stand was made with ATo, called by A9o. I'll let you guess what showed up on the River. Thanks for playing.

$10-$1 - 9th - -$11

Uh huh. Your boy here can't seem to stop playing these damn pocket pairs, but I have an excuse this time...

Party Poker No-Limit Hold'em Tourney, Big Blind is t15 (10 handed) converter

BB (t800)
UTG (t705)
UTG+1 (t800)
UTG+2 (t800)
MP1 (t980)
MP2 (t800)
MP3 (t800)
ICP_Paul (t770)
Button (t790)
SB (t755)


Preflop: ICP_Paul is CO with 7d, 7c.
UTG folds, UTG+1 folds, UTG+2 calls t15, MP1 folds, MP2 folds, MP3 calls t15, ICP_Paul calls t15, Button folds, SB completes, BB checks.


Flop: (t75) Kh, 7h, Jh (5 players)
SB checks, BB checks, UTG+2 bets t50, MP3 calls t50, ICP_Paul calls t50, SB folds, BB folds.


Turn: (t225) 9h (3 players)

UTG+2 bets t100, MP3 folds, ICP_Paul calls t100.


River: (t425) Td (2 players)
UTG+2 checks, ICP_Paul checks.
Final Pot: t425
Main Pot: t425 (t425), between UTG+2 and ICP_Paul. >

Results:

UTG+2 shows Th Jd (flush, king high).

ICP_Paul shows 7d 7c (three of a kind, sevens).

Outcome: UTG+2 wins t425.

This also happened with annoying regularity today. That set the tone for the next 5 minutes I was in this one.

Pocket 9's were overplayed by me for -T60

Then the final suck blow:

Party Poker No-Limit Hold'em Tourney, Big Blind is t15 (9 handed) converter

MP3 (t700)
CO (t615)
Button (t2135)
SB (t1075)
BB (t800)
UTG (t645)
ICP_Paul (t545)
MP1 (t745)
MP2 (t740)


Preflop: ICP_Paul is UTG+1 with Qd, Ad.
UTG calls t15, ICP_Paul raises to t65, MP1 folds, MP2 folds, MP3 raises to t700 (All-In), CO folds, Button folds, SB folds, BB folds, UTG folds, ICP_Paul calls t480 (All-In).


Flop: (t1285) 2h, Ks, 7s (2 players, 2 all-in)


Turn: (t1285) 5s (2 players, 2 all-in)


River: (t1285) As (2 players, 2 all-in)


Final Pot: t1285Main Pot: t1130 (t1130), between MP3 and ICP_Paul. > Pot 2: t155 (t155), overbet by MP3.

Results:

ICP_Paul shows Qd Ad (one pair, aces).

MP3 shows 2c 2d (three of a kind, twos).

Outcome: MP3 wins t1285.

I occurs to me that perhaps I shouldn't leave the house today, what with this kind of luck. Of course, calling an all-in with AQs is just asking for trouble, so I'll chalk this loss up to tilt.

So, I figure since I'm only hitting on about 20% of my hands today, I'd take in a little $1/$2 6 Max goodness. Sat down to a table where the average VP$IP was running around 60%, but of course my card luck followed me like a lost puppy.

-$38.74

Among the greatest hits?

JJ runs into AA.

JTs hits top pair, loses to pocket Queens.

JQo hits the Jack on the flop, board is raggy undercards, lose to a set of 8's.

And countless pre-flop raises that turned into mucks. There was one bright spot to the whole day, though, which was only marred by the fact that I ran out of money to bet into this fool.

Party Poker 1/2 Hold'em (6 max, 5 handed) converter

Preflop: ICP_Paul is Button with Ah, Ac.
UTG folds, MP calls, ICP_Paul raises, SB calls, BB 3-bets, MP folds, ICP_Paul caps, SB folds, BB calls.


Flop: (11 SB) 6d, Kh, 4s (2 players)
BB checks, ICP_Paul bets, BB raises, ICP_Paul 3-bets, BB caps, ICP_Paul calls.


Turn: (9.50 BB) Qs (2 players)
BB checks, ICP_Paul bets, BB raises, ICP_Paul 3-bets, BB calls.


River: (15.50 BB) 8s (2 players)
BB checks, ICP_Paul bets, BB raises, ICP_Paul bets $4.63 (All-In), BB calls.


Final Pot: 20.13 BB
Main Pot: 20.13 BB, between BB and ICP_Paul. > Pot won by ICP_Paul (20.13 BB).

Results:
BB shows Kd 5s (one pair, kings).
ICP_Paul shows Ah Ac (one pair, aces).
Outcome: ICP_Paul wins 20.13 BB.

Dammit. That would have been good for another $8 at least. I know he'd have capped the river.

God, what a rough day. I had 5 really trying days at work, followed by this train wreck. Took a huge bite into my Tourney Challenge, then hobbled my bankroll more with that friggin bath I took in the ring game. God hates me.